In honor of NYC Pride Week, I thought it appropriate to elaborate on how New Yorkers take Pride in our gay men and women. I live in Hells Kitchen, where I assume 80% of all men who cross my path are gay. They smell good, look hotter than me, walk with a sassy swag and laugh like they live in the OC. I have learned in my four and a half years in New York that the gay male population definitely makes neighborhoods better. I would know that because I live in what has been referred to as one of New York's "gayborhoods." Meaning, it is home to many-a-gay. Where there are gay men, one finds better shopping, cleaner streets, better-smelling air, and trendier restaurants. Also, the girls in the neighborhood probably dress better because they are surrounded by their gay friends who give them keenly observant fashion advice daily. This advice is often harsh (I often hear my best guy's voice in my head: "Umm Jenny, that looks ridiculous, take it off," or "Really? The sorority girl hair-puff is a little outdated. Try something else."). However, it is usually accurate.
As I look back on my time in NYC, I recall that I was not always so appreciative of this group of people. In fact, I was once probably judgey of them simply because of lack of exposure. New York has given me exposure to get over such judgey-ness, and for that I am thankful.
When I moved to Manhattan I began easing into the fact that there were gay men all around. Having come from conservative central Florida where I went to college, I had never before been in the presence of multitudes of openly gay men, holding hands and embracing their lifestyle with pride. So I gradually founds myself becoming accustomed. However, one day, I was forced into full-blown acceptance mode when one of my long time friends told me he was gay. I recall the moment vividly. It went a little something like this: I was at home in my Upper East Side apartment on a Friday night, when my friend called me up, clearly a little tipsy from a night on the town. "Jenny!! I'm coming over! I have to tell you something!" As I awaited his arrival, I began to have an inkling of what was about to come. He came to my apartment super excited and chatty, but also seeming a bit nervous. I was nervous too as I knew he was about to tell me something big, and out of nervous habit, I frantically began scrubbing my kitchen counters intensely, waiting for his announcement.
He began, "So, you know how I met that guy. Well, he's really nice and I like him, and..... I'm gay." Me: "Okay." Him: "Did you have any idea?" Me: "Not really. Well, kind of. I thought it was just always a part of your life you hadn't thought much about since you never really talked about girls but you didn't talk about guys either." Him: "Sooo, are you going to be weird with me now?" Me: "No! Well, as long as you don't start acting super gay I'll be okay. And don't start talking about making out with guys right away." Both of us: Burst out into laughter :)
My friend then told me that I was one of his last friends to know. Apparently he was extremely nervous to tell me. That made me a little sad, since obviously my judgey-ness had come through to him, making him hesitant to share with me a big part of his life. Nonetheless, I was happy he finally let me in on this aspect of his life.
Since then (and before then, of course), that relationship has brought much value to my life. Aside from the invaluable fashion advice (mentioned above), he has been a close friend who listens, cares, and puts me in my place when I'm acting extra bratty. He has helped me to become a more loving and open person, and to expand my ability to accept people who are different from me. As for the fun stuff, he keeps me abreast of the latest songs, fragrances, New York hot spots and cultural happenings. For those reasons and many MANY more, I take great pride in my friend and all that he is. Happy PRIDE!
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