We HIDE.

This weekend I was in a glass cage of emotions. My emotional roller coaster came on completely unexpectedly, since the weekend started out beautifully.  Friday night boyfriend-Matt and I went to Lani Kai for a romantic dinner, followed by a meet-up with friends at the bar for tropical drinks. Though I got a little slap-happy and ultra-tired by 11PM, I was in asleep by midnight, a conservative bedtime for a young adult on a Friday night in Manhattan.  

Enjoying a delicious coconut drink at Lani Kai -- who knew things would go downhill after this??

Friday night - while I was still in my happy place.

I was happy as could be when I awoke Saturday morning to coffee and cozy snuggles. But suddenly, around 1PM, the grumps hit me. I was half-heartedly researching a summer vacation spot when my brat-mode switched into high-gear. I got snippy with boyfriend-Matt for not helping with research (even though we hadn't agreed to do any research this weekend and I was selfishly projecting my self-imposed obligations onto him).  "We're never going to book this! This isn't going to work," were among my many grumblings. For no good reason, I simply became angry with everyone and everything within a 1-foot distance from me. 

Thinking a nap would help, I tried putting myself to sleep, but to no avail.  I ended up feeling even more upset as I over-analyzed my emotions in the lair of blankets in my dark bedroom.  All the while, Matt  sweetly tried to comfort me by laying beside me, stroking my head lovingly, and assuring me it was okay to have a grumpy day once in a while.  Still, I was determined to overcome these icky-ugly emotions, so I had the brilliant idea to venture outside and "play tennis" (a.k.a. uncontrollably hit tennis balls on the basketball court of a creepy playground down the block).  Surely endorphins would do the trick!  After all, endorphins make people happy, and happy people don't just kill their husbands (think "Legally Blonde")!!  Even though it was spitting rain, cold and windy outside, Matt graciously agreed to play with me (I'm sure my Angel was willing to do anything at that point to help me out of my slump which I was surely taking out on him).  We donned our workout wear and trekked outside of the apartment for the first time all day at about 4PM.  The murky weather almost deterred us, but since we had come so far (a whopping half of a block) we decided to press on.  All started out well, until Matt's playful swinging of the tennis racket met my swatting hand and I burst into tears. The crying lasted for about 2 minutes and I got over it. After playing, I actually did feel a little better. But not for long. 

We headed home and watched a few episodes of "Underover Boss" while cooking dinner. Harmless, emotionally neutral circumstances, right? Wrong! I cried during several parts of "Undercover Boss" and I had a mishap with dinner.  After dropping a tomato in a sink full of dirty dishwater, I cried again, yelled "Damn it!" (I rarely curse) and pounded the counter with my fist several times.  I whined a few minutes more, and then re-collected myself.  To top off my range of emotions for the evening, I was a super birtch for no apparent reason to roommate-Matt when he came home later that night (sorry Matty-pie!).  

Today I decided the best way to recover from my emotional hangover was to hide inside and watch Bravo on demand all day. However, avoiding the world watching interior design shows backfired on me,  and ended up making me feel guilty and unproductive. To eliminate all such feelings, I attempted to cross off something that's been on my domestic to-do list for many months: hang shelves in my bedroom.   Bad idea. One of the screws broke, the shelves fell on my head, and I crumbled to the floor crying at the sight of my failure which glared back at me in the form of 12 gaping holes in the now scratched-up wall.  Thankfully roommate-Matt whipped me into shape: "Stop crying! Get up!" and he too laughed at me.  Finally, a few hours later I came to my senses: I cleaned my room, lit some candles and started to blog :)  Now I feel much better.

Remnants of my shelf-hanging attempts -- post-breakdown.

Moral of the story: Sometimes you're allowed to be grumpy for a day or two. But on those days, don't try to cook fancy meals, play sports in miserable weather, or do handiwork around the home. Just be cozy and hide for a while.